New Years now brings us the best time for people with useless blogs. Useless Top Ten Lists!
Lets start with our one true god. Television.
The Ed's Daily Rant 2004 Television in reviewBest new showAnd the nominees are...
House.It's like a medical Sherlock Holmes (And we know how much geek Ed
likes his Sherlock Holmes). Well written and well acted. Although they overdo the "I'm an eccentric grouchy Doctor!" bit.
Kevin HillAll this time and I never knew my brother had a sassy gay no nonsense nanny.
LostInnovative premise done with flair. The way they have a big mystery that they keep slowly revealing week by week is a great hook. Some of the characters are a bit cliched (i half expect to see an italian gangster strumming a violin case) but it makes up for it with innovative plot devices (the extended flashback) and great pacing.
And the winner is:House.Beats out Lost by a hair.
Best new Reality show.cuz EdHill is all about the reality shows.
And the nominees are...
Amish in the CityReal World with half of em Amish kids. It worked simply because the Amish are the last people on earth left who don't know to fake it when a contestant on a reality show. Watching the girl be overwhelmed at her first site of the ocean was touching. I did come to realize that Amish people are just as annoying and stupid as everyone else. Except Mose!
Mad Mad HouseThe outright winner for funniest reality show of the year no question. Make people live with, compete for, and get voted the winner by, the "alts" which consisted of a "vampire", a "witch" a "voodoo priestess" a "savage" and a "naturalist". The enjoyment of the show was watching these so called "Alts" actually pretend that the new agey nonsense they were spewing was interesting. The "witch" was some platinum blonde fake boobed over the hill d list rock singer who was also a Wiccan. Every week we had to hear her going on and on about negative energy in the house and spiritual awakenings, and this and that... Pure comic gold. ANd who could forget the week when she felt the spirits calling her evil side out and she wore black for an episode and was bitchy to everyone. You gotta understand that when you realize they are taking themselves seriously, the comedic factor is off the charts.
But the star of the show was the one and only "Vampire Don". Oh man I love that guy. He's a computer programmer from Sausalito, but dont tell him that, hes a Vampire! The cameras would constantly catch Don acting like computer programmer Don, and then he'd notice the camera was on him, and he'd go into "Vampire mode". That killed me. Every line out of his mouth was instantly quotable.
"When did you realze you wanted to be a vampire?"
"Wanted? It just....is......."
Oh man I miss Vampire Don so much I became a member of his
official website.
Project RunwayIt takes many of the used reality show situations, but it perfects them all. The people there are interesting and not media whores, They are actually there to win, and not be the next "Omarosa", they all have talent (except maybe Starr, Sheesh), and the judges comments are smart, on target, and not grandstanding for camera time. And host Heidi Klums accent is fascinating. Hoang Wood described it best as 70% perfect english, 20 % with a German accent and 10% a Grab bag of god knows what.
Winner:Mad Mad HouseAs much as I like Project Runway, Mad Mad House was just the funniest goddamn reality show all year. Me and my friend Fancy Nancy would spend all week talking about how we couldn't wait for the next episode. And Kelly, the fat right wing college student, was such a freak show, I couldnt get enough of her.
Worst Show of the YearNot an accurate description because the worst shows of the year, garbage like dr. Vegas and Father of the Pride, I never bothered with. Rather these are shows that I thought would be good, but turned out to be shit.
And the nominees are....
The Rebel BillionareSounds good. Apprentice meets Amazing Race. But Branson is hands down the most boring Billionare ever and brings any scene hes in to a screeching halt. The man makes extreme sports boring for gods sake. And the idea that he's going to give away his job to soemone who could be the ebst bungee jumper is retarded.
Jack and BobbyIt got good reviews and has a polltical undercurrent, but One episode and I was bored to tears. It's like Everwood, only dumber.
JoeyYeah yeah, We all knew it was gonna suck, but who knew it would suck so utterly and completly. Well, it does. And someone needs to tell Drea De Matteo that she is in fact, very very ugly. Apparently she didnt get the memo.
The SwanDepressing in every way iamginable, and I usually revel in other peoples misery.
And the winner is....
JoeyIt sucks. And not even in that trainwreck watchable kind of way.
Best show I should be watching.According to what I read and opinions of people I trust, here are shows I apparently should be watching but don't.
Desperate HousewivesThe WireArrested DevelopmentReno 911And the winner is....
How would I know? I dont watch em.
Best all around showTough category, and my answer tomorrow would be different as it constantly changes. But what was the show, either old or new, that was the absolute must see best show of the year?
The nominees are....
ScrubsTake out John C. McGinley's character completly and its the most laugh out loud show on TV.
The Daily ShowConsistently funny and especially cathartic since November 2nd.
Curb Your EnthusiasmBallsy, R rated Sienfeld. Really funny. What other sitcom can have a joke be the star choking on a pubic hair while being beaten up by a Nativity scene Joesph?
AliasFascinating plot twists (Imagine the war ending halfway through Hogans Heroes run, thats what happened in Season 3), good action, good villains, and Jennifer Garner constantly being gussied up in one undercover slut outfit after another.
West WingThe President we
should have.
SmallvilleMoved more toward creating a new mythlogy this year and away from the "villain of the week" formula that got stale last year. And introducing a spunky large breasted Lois Lane was a good antidote to the cold fish that is Lana Lang.
EnterpriseNot as good as Next Generation, but way better than Voyager and DS9. Had a downbeat interminably long 9/11 like plotline last year that almost buried it, but this year has gotten much better. Sadly this may be its last year. They
gotta change that theme song though.
Winner:LIke I said, it'll change tommorow, but...
The Daily ShowAlmost never strikes a wrong note. 4 hours a week of the funniest humor around, and a guest list that is interesting and eclectic. And Jon Stewarts interview style is both engaging, challenging, and funny all at the same time. It risked overexposure this year with the book tour, but its still funny shit.
Honorable Mention:Deadwood, Soprano's (see you in 2008!), The Office, History Detectives, Foyles War, Simpsons, Chappelle's Show, South Park, MI-5, and many more.
Best anal scene:Chitty Chitty Gang Bang